WHAT IS IN CIVIL MARRIAGE
An increasing number of couples choose for themselves cohabitation, or as it is commonly called civil marriage. In this case, most often the initiators of this kind of relationship are representatives of the stronger sex. After all, it is so important for men to feel independent and free from any kind of obligations. Women, on the other hand, still like an officially registered marriage, even though the stamp in the passport rarely becomes an obstacle for a man who wants to leave his wife.
For the first time, marriages that were not officially registered began to appear in the Netherlands as early as the 16th century. At that time, the inhabitants of this country had a law according to which a man and a woman of different religions did not have the right to enter into a marriage union. Church marriage was considered official, but only the authorities could decide a situation of this kind. Currently, church marriage does not carry any legal consequences. Only a union sealed in the bodies of the registry office is considered official.
In Western countries, informal marriages have long been considered the norm, while in our country, cohabitants are still subject to some kind of condemnation from the public. But this does not stop modern couples. Guys and girls understand that such living together can give them the opportunity to get to know each other better, including in everyday life, before putting a stamp in the passport. After all, this is the only way to reveal all the positive and negative aspects of the character of your partner.
How society relates to civil marriage
Public opinion plays an important role in the life of any person. A number of people are highly dependent on what people around them can think and say about him, but for someone these are just words that should not be given much importance.
Nevertheless, it is public opinion that can greatly harm the image of a person created over the years. The attitude towards civil marriage in our country is still negative, and, therefore, it is one of the most favorite topics for gossip.
Couples who choose this format of relationship for themselves will inevitably become a target for discussion and attract attention. In addition, for many, a person who does not want to enter into an official marriage is simply irresponsible, which means that it is also impossible to entrust him with some important work.
What are the risks for couples living in a civil marriage
Without delving into the basics of civil marriage, you might think that it contains only positive aspects, but in practice this is not at all the case. Living together before marriage has both advantages and disadvantages.
Of course, the first plus is freedom, especially men are happy about it. Such relationships not only do not carry legal consequences, but from a psychological point of view they give independence. In such comfortable conditions, the period of romantic courtship, as a rule, lasts longer. And in the event that the partners, having lived together for a certain time period, still decide to part, it is easier to experience than after a divorce. After all, couples who are officially married will have to go through a difficult divorce process, often associated with the division of property and even children.
Couples who have lived in a civil marriage for some time claim that this is the only plus that they saw in him. When a couple breaks up between themselves in a relationship that is not stamped in the passport, many pitfalls emerge. So, living together, a man and a woman run a common household, which means that together they acquire any items of equipment, utensils or even an apartment. Most often, the main source of all family income is the man’s salary, and therefore all acquired property is recorded in his name. The woman remains completely unprotected. When parting, she will receive absolutely nothing and is unlikely to be able to prove that she was financially involved in the acquisition of these things. Even when going to court, it will be difficult for a girl to prove her case, because she will not be able to document her words.
In this regard, official marriage will become a much more protected form of relationship for a couple. Family law provides equal rights for spouses. In addition, the wife and husband have the opportunity to conclude a marriage contract, in which they can directly stipulate what will go to each of them in the event of a divorce. At the same time, a couple can protect themselves in this way both before entering into a legal marriage, in which case the contract will come into force from the date of registration of the marriage union, and at any time after.
Abroad, where cohabitation is no longer a novelty, legislation has gone a little further. So, in the Dominican Republic, for example, if a man and a woman have lived together for more than 4 years, but have not registered their relationship, their property is still considered common and is subject to division in equal parts. In France, cohabitants have the right to conclude an agreement, which by its legal nature resembles a marriage contract, where all the rights and obligations of the spouses are directly prescribed, including the division of property. American judges, more than once in their practice, have dealt with cases in which girls proved the fact that they were in an unofficial marriage with a guy. They often ended with the recognition that, in fact, the woman was the legal wife of the man, which means that she can equally claim the jointly acquired property.
The most negative side of a civil marriage is the fact that children born to such a couple often begin to feel inferior under pressure from society. It is not possible for the fragile child psyche to understand why mom and dad live under different surnames, why they did not seal all their relationships in the registry office. Here, parents will need to spend a lot of effort to explain to their child that the absence of a stamp in the passport does not reflect negatively on their family, that they love him and each other just the same.
Can cohabitation become a habit?
Unfortunately, having lived with a woman a little in a civil marriage, a man often begins to postpone the marriage proposal to a later period. Every year his desire to take this girl as his legal wife becomes less and less. He, therefore, has everything he wants from this relationship. Even if, after many years of cohabitation, the guy still agrees to marry his soulmate, then, as a rule, the marriage ceremony will not come down to a magnificent wedding, but only to a modest registration without guests and a chic celebration. Having a common budget and some savings, the couple would prefer not to spend them in one day, but to invest in something really worthwhile and necessary for their family.
What to choose: official marriage or agree to cohabitation
To make a choice for themselves between an officially registered marriage and simple cohabitation, each couple must independently weigh all its minuses and pluses.
So, for those who have already had an unsuccessful experience of building love relationships, civil marriage can be a good alternative for the first time. It is by living together with your loved one under the same roof 24 hours a day that you can learn everything about him. Habits, character traits – all this lies on the surface when living together, while just meeting, it is not possible to fully understand a person. Whether there is a prospect for the relationship will become clear very quickly. If the relationship still does not work out, it will be easy to leave without wasting time on litigation.
At the same time, before agreeing to a civil marriage with a loved one, it would be most expedient for a girl to discuss with him the time period that their relationship will be in such a suspended state. During the conversation, she needs to find out what goals the partner sets for himself, offering her not marriage, but cohabitation.
If, after this conversation, the couple manages to come to a mutual decision, the woman will need to understand that she is the unprotected legal unit of this marriage. When purchasing some kind of equipment with her own money, she needs to hint to her husband in a relaxed manner that she wants to register a check in her name. At the same time, it is important to maintain tact and not humiliate male pride. It will also help to protect yourself and keep a book of the family budget, which will clearly reflect all the expenses incurred by the family during the period of civil marriage.
But in a situation where a woman does not accept for herself the usual cohabitation with a loved one, she should not be afraid to offend him with a refusal. A loved one will always understand and accept any of her decisions.