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Answer the question: how many times a week do you have sex? And in a month? You may not have to calculate for a long time, or, on the contrary, you will “drown" in numbers. But now the conversation will not be about a lot or a little, but about how much is needed. Surely, you have often had to think about what is the norm of sex in our lives, so let’s try to figure it out together.

How much sex do you need

At first glance, the question is: how much sex do you need? it sounds a little ridiculous, but on numerous women’s forums it is exaggerated quite often, and sometimes it puzzles even the most sophisticated ladies who wonder if there is really enough intimacy in their life? 

Attitudes towards sex and its quantity in people’s lives have changed with every century and differed in different cultures. Prophets, priests, representatives of state power clearly defined what the sexual life of people should be like and at the same time stipulated the number of mandatory (or permissible) “times”.

“Sex 2 times a week is more than enough,” says the ancient holy book “Talmud”, with which most sexologists agree. Modern gurus call: "The more, the better!" In contrast, ardent feminists call for sex only for the sake of procreation, not considering it a necessity. Finding your "golden" middle is quite difficult.

The sex revolution that took place in the second half of the 20th century made love territory more democratic, allowing us to decide for ourselves when and how, as well as how much. However, having made a cult out of love, the sexual revolution, in addition to defeating taboos, also had negative consequences, one of which was the habit of considering a person who rarely makes love as a hypocrite or sick. And the difference between long sex sessions in movies and books and real intercourse is not normal. So is it really good when there is a lot and for a long time?

In fact, the intensity of intimate life, according to sexologists, largely depends on age. They recommend following the numbers below:

  • For 20-25-year-old partners, the norm is 4 times a week;
  • For 25 – 30-year-olds – 3; 
  • For 30 – 40-year-olds – 2, 
  • For mature partners after 45 – at least one. 

These figures, of course, are approximate and may vary depending on the temperament of the partners. Temperament we get from birth and it is determined by the amount of hormones in the body.

For example, people with a low temperament have a rather weak libido, and therefore having sex once a month is quite enough for them. Men and women with a high hormonal status (temperament) are ready to make love every day, or even several times a day. But the most common type of temperament is still average. For people who have it, their personal life (and sexual life too) develops “according to their mood”, while 2-3 sexual discharges per week are usually enough for them. 

I must say, according to scientists, it is this much sex that can be considered optimal. Moreover, if you want more – please, but reducing this amount is not recommended, since lovemaking, in addition to pleasure, has a positive effect on health, both in women and men.

So, we seem to have sorted out the quantity, but what about the duration of the sexual “marathon”?

How much to have sex

According to specialists – sexologists, a short, as most of the inhabitants believe, 3-5-minute sexual intercourse is a physiological norm, and not at all a deviation. To look at least at other males from the animal world, for whom copulation does not take more than a couple of minutes – you can’t argue against nature. Another thing is that men can be smarter and use all sorts of tricks to prolong their and their partner’s pleasure. By the way, the advanced age of the partner, prolonged abstinence, mental problems and some other factors reduce the duration of copulation. 

If a man “shoots back” after 2 minutes of effort or earlier, this is an occasion to pay attention to his health. Such a problem is usually solved, but only if you contact a specialist with it.

Paradoxically, men are often much more worried about the duration of sexual intercourse than women. Taking for an axiom the already mentioned slogan “The more the better”, they fanatically try to stretch the sex for an hour, or even two. And it’s not even that going against nature is not easy enough. Often, this does not make much sense, since most women need an average of 10 minutes to get pleasure. Of course, everything is very individual, and there are ladies who love longer, but basically the fair sex prefers a long foreplay and caresses that bring them to the peak, which the very few minutes of “active movements” allow to reach. 

So, the norm is a loose concept, why drive yourself into the framework of standards? The main thing is that both partners are satisfied with their sex life, and how often they make love and how long it takes is a secondary matter.

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