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Becoming a mother – what could be better for a woman? But do not forget that becoming a mother, you have not ceased to be a woman – beloved, beautiful and desirable. The experience and statements of many women show that sex after childbirth is very similar to the “first time". There are lucky women who, while still in the hospital, dream of making love and, soon, this dream comes true. Unfortunately, there are not many of them – according to statistics, 50% of newly-made mothers face problems in their intimate life within 3 months after giving birth, and about 20% of these problems haunt the entire first year. When and how can they be resolved?

When to have sex after giving birth

It is recommended to start having sex no earlier than 4-6 weeks after childbirth. This is due, first of all, to the fact that the uterus returns to its previous size, which it was before childbirth, and the place where the placenta was attached heals (after all, after the separation of the placenta, a continuous wound remained on the uterus). And if an infection gets into this wound, it can end up with inflammation of the uterus.

The vagina should also return to its prenatal state. And just within 6 weeks, it gradually narrows. To speed up this process, doctors recommend performing Kegel exercises, which train the muscles of the perineum and vagina. These exercises were invented by the American gynecologist Arnold Kegel in the last century for women who experienced involuntary urination after childbirth. Subsequently, it turned out that the regular implementation of these exercises can increase sexual tone, improve blood circulation, and even allow you to control orgasm.

Even if the birth occurred by caesarean section, and the vagina in this case has not undergone any changes, then the wound from the placenta should still heal. In addition, the scar on the uterus after the "caesarean" should also heal.

It happens that, even after receiving approval from a doctor for having sex, a woman after giving birth for some reason does not want to do it. This may be due to a decrease in the level of a hormone such as estrogen. After all, while the child needs constant care from the mother and cannot survive without outside help, the mother does not need another baby yet. Due to the decrease in this hormone, dryness in the vagina can also be observed. 

There are other, more conscious, reasons:

  • feeling unattractive. Most often, after childbirth, the figure of a woman loses her girlish forms, but most men find this attractive;
  • fatigue (if there is also resentment towards the husband, who does not really help in caring for the child), which is expressed in the phrase “I don’t have time for this now!”
  • postpartum depression, which occurs in 10% of women, can also cause a decrease in libido.

Fear of making love in young mothers:

  • the child can wake up at the most crucial moment. Fear is tension, and tension is that which makes a woman unable to relax;
  • expectation and fear of pain – "what if not everything has healed as it should." In this case, it is better to see a doctor once again.
  • a new pregnancy, which immediately after the first may not be very helpful. However, contraceptive methods have not yet been canceled.

By the way, about contraception. For some reason, it is very common among people that after childbirth and during breastfeeding, a woman cannot become pregnant (or until her menstrual cycle is restored).

This is far from being the case, and moreover, until the cycle has begun and normalized, it is very easy not to notice a new pregnancy. Menstruation may begin on the 28th day after birth, or it may not begin the entire period of lactation. But this does not mean at all that you are insured against pregnancy. What to do?

Regarding the most suitable method of contraception (hormonal pills, intrauterine device or barrier contraception) in each case, it is best to consult a doctor. Since different types of contraception have certain limitations in the use of young mothers (especially in terms of timing).

First sex after giving birth

Many women say that sex after childbirth feels very much like "the very first time." This, by and large, must be borne in mind by the newly-made father, burning with desire. To begin with, he needs to share with his wife all the troubles of caring for the child, and not just the bed, and also be patient.

To eliminate muscle tension, you can practice massage using essential oils. At the very beginning, it is best to choose a position in which you yourself will regulate the penetrations and their frequency (for example, "rider"). For vaginal dryness, gels and lubricants designed specifically for this purpose can be used.

And yet, be sure – the male look is less demanding than the female one, so there is no need to doubt your attractiveness for your spouse.

There is an opinion that the restoration of intimate relationships is the end of the postpartum period and the beginning of a new stage of life and family happiness. So let it be happy for you!

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